The Fundies vs the Charismaniacs

(parody of "Be Thou My Vision" (old hymn) and "Mighty Is Our God" by Gerrit Gustafson)
New lyrics by Mike Fischer

The Story: please don't ask me why I wrote these, because I couldn't give you a good reason. I'm sure God hates the divisions among our churches, but the two sides seem to be polarizing ever further away from each other (and from what God had in mind).


The Fundies sing (to "Be Thou My Vision"):

We see no visions, we don't prophesy.
Pastor won't preach unless he wears a tie.
We don't raise hands and we don't speak in tongues.
Century-old hymns are the "new songs" we've sung.

We don't cast demons, we don't know their names.
We don't read NIV, only King James.
We don't see movies and we do not dance.
Men have short hair and their wives don't wear pants.

We like to use words like "thee," "thou," and "thine."
Jesus changed water to grape juice, not wine.
We seek God's power, we'll find it some day.
Just see no visions and you'll be okay.

The Charismaniacs sing (to "Mighty Is Our God"):

We won't be like them.
We will dance and sing.
We will pray in tongues.
We will try anything.

We will claim the land
For the King of Kings.
We will raise our hands.
We will try anything.

If we are laughing, barking and roaring, it's okay.
If we are blessed, we'll get slain in the Spirit anyway.

We'll pray Jabez' prayer
While we're worshipping.
Doctrine — we don't care.
We will try anything.

If you have questions about what we're doing, that's all right.
Just ask your shepherd when home group meets on Wednesday night.

We will pray for signs
'Til the rafters ring.
We're out of our minds.
We will try anything.

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